Barney Miller

It's the day before Fish retires and he's nowhere to be found. Meanwhile, Barney and the detectives have to deal with a group of disgruntled business owners forming a vigilante organization to deal with the crime rate in the neighborhood.

When Fish finally arrives at the twelfth precinct after worrying his wife and colleagues, he refuses to acknowledge he has to retire because of his age. Dietrich and Harris arrest a paranoid man demolishing the security cameras at a supermarket.

Barney and the detectives are in for a surprise and become paranoid when the exterminator dealing with a cockroach problem in the squad room discovers a listening device.

An attorney for a large chemical company comes to the twelfth precinct to ask for assistance in identifying the person who has been vandalizing their properties. Wojo brings in a homeless woman who was the victim of a mugging so she could fill out a report.

When Fish returns to the twelfth precinct to fill out some paperwork for his pension, he assists his former colleagues in locating the corpse that was kidnapped from a nearby mortuary.

As Wojo anxiously awaits the results of his sergeant's exam, Harris laments not being able to find a suitable apartment to move into. Thanks to the bright idea of Yemana, the detectives try using a tv guide to figure out where a copy cat criminal will strike next, based on what will be on television for the upcoming week. Harris brings in a drunk when he attempts to rob a liquor store without the use of a weapon.

With the city experiencing a blizzard, Barney and the detectives are currently having to deal with a suspect dying while in custody and the coroner's office unable to come and retrieve the body. Dietrich and Harris arrest an eccentric man who claims the world is about to end with an upcoming ice age.

Barney looses his cool when he discovers that Lieutenant Scanlon has enlisted the aid of a drug pusher to test the members of the precincts honesty. Wojo has taxi cab problems.

Fork stabbing highlights Thanksgiving, three mental patients have Thanksgiving dinner at a laundromat.

Harris searches Manhattan for an apartment that is up to his intended lifestyle; Wojo is buried alive while pursuing a thief.

The FBI arrives at the twelfth precinct to help Barney and the detectives investigate a college student who inadvertently built a functional atomic bomb.

Wojo and Yemana bring in a suspect for causing a ruckus at a cryogenics lab after he discovers they accidentally destroyed his last viable sample before he and his wife can start a family. Harris continues to have bad luck in finding a new apartment to rent.

Levitt brings in a couple for fighting on the street and causing a scene. Dietrich and Wojo arrest a man for destruction of property and is told a wild story of ghostly possession. Yemana goes on a call to a bakery accused of making and selling obscene baked goods.

Dietrich and Harris arrest a sugar addict when he attacks a woman at a local candy shop. Barney and Wojo try to talk a retired man out of becoming a bounty hunter. Yemana suffers an appendicitis attack and gets taken to the hospital.

A woman arrives at the twelfth precinct, looking to charge her husband with rape. The detectives are tasked with finding a master thief who robs his victims in different disguises each time he commits his crimes. Yemana is happy when he learns the city legalizes off-track betting and won't have to make his wagers through his bookie.

After Wojo brings in a pair of tenants for defying an eviction order at a nearby hotel, Barney finds himself in a sticky situation when the available departments that normally would help have been giving them the runaround. Dietrich gets a call for a store robbery. Meanwhile, Luger seeks Barney's guid on how to spend some of his vacation time.

With Barney under modified duty for failure to evict the tenants of the hotel, the NYPD SWAT team gets called in. Meanwhile, Dietrich's suspect is able to recall who she is.

When a new female detective gets assigned to the twelfth precinct, her jealous husband starts causing problems with her colleagues. Barney attempts to give Harris some advice about his living arrangement with Dietrich. Harris and Yemana get a call about a robber and are surprised to find out he's confined to a wheelchair. Wojo brings some private problems to work, resulting in his colleagues awkwardly trying to avoid giving him some advice.

With Barney out on a call, Harris is tasked with filing a report on a nearby Art Gallery when a concerned citizen is offended by paintings she deems obscene. The detectives then get concerned when a call comes in about Barney being shot at on that robbery call. Barney and his wife Liz then have a heart to heart about the dangers he faces while on duty.

A robbery suspect Harris brings calls his brother for help in escaping, resulting in the detectives, Levitt and Luger being held hostage. Wojo and Officer Licori bring in a ventriloquist and a woman for fighting over the obscene comments made by the ventriloquist's doll.

As the detectives await the results of their work evaluations, Wojo accidentally walks in on Liccori as she uses the restroom. Harris brings in a suspect that caused a disturbance at the bank and only identifies himself as the number 1223. Wojo and Dietrich go out on a vandalism call at a porn shop owned by an elderly couple and are soon surprised at who the perpetrators are.

When Barney questions Wojo about his tardiness in arriving at work, his explanation is due to seeing a UFO on his way home from Staten Island. Harris assists a woman who wants something to be done about her husband who is liquidating their assets in order to buy gold.

As the residents of the city get caught up in the festivities leading up to Mayor Koch's inauguration, Harris gets a tempting offer a permanent spot to work on his security detail. Barney fields a call from an anonymous fanatic threatening to end his life as a political threat. Wojo brings in a suspect for possession of marijuana for medical use. Dietrich brings in an eccentric elderly woman accused of sending threatening letters.