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Genres: Comedy
Station: CBS (US)
Status: Ended
Start: 2003-09-22

Two and a Half Men Next Episode Air Date

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Two and a Half Men Pictures

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Two and a Half Men Air Dates

Ratings: 7.56/10 from 9 users
  • S01E01 - Pilot

    Carefree jingle writer Charlie Harper (Charlie Sheen) has his lifestyle altered when his uptight brother and his 10-year-old nephew (Jon Cryer, Angus T. Jones) move in with him.

    Air Date: 23 September 2003 01:00 -
  • S01E02 - Big Flappy Bastards

    Despite warnings from Charlie, Jake continues to feed seagulls on the deck and the birds invade the house. Meanwhile, Charlie thinks Judith is taking advantage of Alan, who keeps going to her house to fix things.

    Air Date: 30 September 2003 01:00 -
  • S01E03 - Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

    Jake wants to go home to his mom after he gets sick, prompting Alan to think he's a failure as a husband and now as a father. Cab Driver: Darryl Sivad. Rose: Melanie Lynskey. Evelyn: Holland Taylor.

    Air Date: 07 October 2003 01:00 -
  • S01E04 - If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song I'm Going to Take a Nap

    Charlie can't function when his housekeeper (Conchata Ferrell) storms off because of Alan's constant complaints, so Alan tries desperately to woo her back. Meanwhile, Rose comes to Charlie for dating advice.

    Air Date: 14 October 2003 01:00 -
  • S01E05 - The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up With a Hump

    Alan and Charlie have encounters with some highly libidinous soccer moms, but with two very different outcomes.

    Air Date: 21 October 2003 01:00 -
  • S01E06 - Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

    The guys go to Evelyn's house to meet the new man she's dating, and Charlie realizes the man's daughter (Krista Allen) is a woman he's trying to avoid.

    Air Date: 28 October 2003 02:00 -
  • S01E07 - If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

    Judith is upset with Alan and Charlie when she learns that a surfer (Kristin Datillo) who uses Charlie's shower walks around half naked in front of Jake . Then Alan's worried when Judith and the surfer become friends.

    Air Date: 04 November 2003 02:00 -
  • S01E08 - Twenty-Five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful

    Alan tricks Charlie into joining him and Judith in leading Jake and his classmates in the school's annual music show.

    Air Date: 11 November 2003 02:00 -
  • S01E09 - Phase One, Complete

    Charlie is convinced that a woman (Myndy Crist) who spent the night with him wants to turn their relationship into something serious after she befriends Jake and Evelyn.

    Air Date: 18 November 2003 02:00 -
  • S01E10 - Merry Thanksgiving

    Denise Richards plays Charlie's engaged old love. Realizing he's losing someone special, Charlie plans a Thanksgiving dinner to convince her he's a family guy and that she should be with him.

    Air Date: 25 November 2003 02:00 -
  • S01E11 - Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

    When Alan is surprised to see that Judith has had a makeover and is dating a man, he decides to have Charlie help him transform his image.

    Air Date: 16 December 2003 02:00 -
  • S01E12 - Camel Filters + Pheromones

    Berta's granddaughter (Megan Fox) spends the day at Charlie's, which isn't a problem until he learns she's a beautiful, rebellious 16-year-old.

    Air Date: 06 January 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E13 - Sarah Like Puny Alan

    Charlie nurses an ailing Alan back to health so they can go on a double date with two sisters, one of whom Charlie's been wanting to date for a long time.

    Air Date: 13 January 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E14 - I Can't Afford Hyenas

    Charlie's financial manager (Richard Lewis) informs the carefree jingle writer that he spends money faster than his royalty checks come in, and now he must go on a budget.

    Air Date: 03 February 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E15 - Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick (1)

    Jenna Elfman plays a mysterious, slightly crazed woman whom Charlie invites to stay at the house until she can settle some family problems.

    Air Date: 10 February 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E16 - That Was Saliva, Alan (2)

    Charlie is perplexed when Frankie (Jenna Elfman), the mysterious woman temporarily living in the Harper household, begins falling for Alan and not him.

    Air Date: 17 February 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E17 - Ate The Hamburgers, Wearing The Hats

    Charlie's still brooding over Alan's choice of their cousin as Jake's guardian if both parents die when the boy has an accident while in his care and has to be rushed to the hospital.

    Air Date: 24 February 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E18 - An Old Flame With a New Wick

    Chris O'Donnell plays one of Charlie's ex-girlfriends, who is now a man. It gets better: He starts dating Evelyn (Holland Taylor), who's clueless about his past history with her son.

    Air Date: 02 March 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E19 - I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You

    Judith's devious siren sister (Teri Hatcher) stirs things up at Jake's 11th birthday party when she hits on Alan. Meanwhile, Evelyn brings alcohol and has a party of her own.

    Air Date: 23 March 2004 02:00 -
  • S01E20 - Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark

    Jake's sullen mood baffles and bothers the family and prompts Alan and Judith to take him to a child psychologist (Jane Lynch).

    Air Date: 20 April 2004 01:00 -
  • S01E21 - No Sniffing, No Wowing

    Charlie plays a tricky game when he gets involved with Alan's divorce lawyer (Heather Locklear), who could make things difficult for Alan if she were, say, dumped by a self-centered lothario.

    Air Date: 04 May 2004 01:00 -
  • S01E22 - My Doctor has a Cow Puppet

    When Charlie discovers that Alan is sleepwalking, he believes it's related to his brother's lack of sex following his divorce, and comes up with a cure.

    Air Date: 11 May 2004 01:00 -
  • S01E23 - Just Like Buffalo

    When Jake repeats one of Charlie's sexist remarks in front of Judith's support group, the women convince Judith to stop Jake's visits with his dad and Charlie.

    Air Date: 18 May 2004 01:00 -
  • S01E24 - Can You Feel My Finger?

    Charlie has a pregnancy scare involving one of his one-night stands and decides to go for the big "V," and we're not talking Vegas.

    Air Date: 25 May 2004 01:00 -