Hayley sends the family into chaos after she and her old boyfriend run off and elope. Stan offers a reward to whomever stops the couple, sparking a cannonball run through town in order to stop them in the "100 A.D..
After Stan creates a clone of Steve, Francine and Stan compete with each other to determine who has better parenting skills. Meanwhile, Roger tracks down the AWOL bride and groom in Thailand.
Stan and Francine have had the scariest haunted house on the block for eight years running, but when one of their neighbors provides some stiff competition, Stan ups the ante with a "killer" set-up. Meanwhile, Steve falls head over heels for his overprotective friend's younger sister and competes to win her heart in a Halloween showdown.
Stan is ecstatic when Roger offers to help him live out his lifelong dream of opening a restaurant to rival his favorite childhood haunt - until their different visions for what the eatery should be cause havoc. Meanwhile, Steve meets Ashley (guest voice Panettiere), the new girl in school who invites him over while her parents are out of town.
After an argument between Stan and Francine breaks out, Stan suggests they go see a counselor (guest voice Alexander), who hypnotizes Francine and reawakens her lifelong dream of being a comedian. Meanwhile, back in Langley Falls, Steve brings home a potential love interest for Klaus.
It's Thanksgiving in Langley Falls, and as usual, Stan invites his half-brother, Rusty (guest voice Phillips), over to show off his cornucopia of wealth and good fortune. But when Stan finds out that Rusty is far wealthier than he led on, Stan tries to take from Rusty what he feels is rightfully his. Things don't go well, and the Smith family nearly loses it all.
If there's one thing that Stan Smith loves, it's a good jury trial. He anxiously awaits his annual jury summons. But when Roger is the defendant in the trial where Stan is the foreman, he is finally in a position to make Roger accountable for his misdeeds. Meanwhile, Jeff and Hayley move in with the Smiths, and Francine tries to get Jeff to clean up his act.
Stan gives Steve a gun for Christmas, even though Francine warns him that Steve is too young. As usual, Stan ignores her, and when Steve accidentally shoots Santa, he sends the North Pole into a tizzy and jeopardizes Christmas.
After Roger releases lethal gas into the Smith residence, the family moves into a hotel while the fumes clear. With no housework to do, Francine finds herself with a lot of free time on her hands. After befriending the hotel concierge (guest voice Elizondo), she soon finds herself working in the construction business, but realizes that perhaps she is better suited for family life.
When Stan and Francine meet a young couple, Tom (guest voice Hall) and Cami (guest voice Chalke), their predictable lives get a shot of adrenaline as they do their best to keep up with the younger couple's crazy and adventurous lifestyle. But it isn't long before Stan and Francine struggle to keep up and come up with a plan to slow Tom and Cami down permanently.
With a flair for the dramatic, Roger invites Stan to attend one of his acting classes. However, tempers flare when they both audition for the same role, leaving them to duke it out for top dog. Meanwhile, Steve and his friends get into a pillow fight when they try to plan the greatest slumber party ever.
When Stan and Roger disagree over a recent string of events, Roger moves out of the house in protest but is quickly replaced by another warm body. After Roger learns of the replacement roomie, the two of them battle for Stan's affection. Meanwhile, Steve gets a new job at school that allows him to do a little self-promotion over the P.A. system.
When Steve challenges Stan for family dominance, Stan does everything he can to prove to Steve that he is the alpha male of the Smith house. Meanwhile, Hayley and Jeff seek marriage counseling when the honeymoon phase wears off.
In an attempt to advance in the CIA, Stan begins playing golf with Senator Buckingham (guest voice Reynolds). Things are going well until Roger accidentally sells the senator's daughter to a drug lord, forcing Stan must choose between family and his career.
When Steve has trouble crossing over into the "cool kids" social circle, Klaus and Roger place their bets to see how quickly Roger can make him cool. Everything they try backfires until Steve becomes the in-crowds designated driver. Meanwhile, Stan and Francine take turns pranking each other.
After Snot professes his love for Hayley and gets shot down, Steve and Roger devise a plan to cheer him up. Roger dresses up as Steve's cousin from New Jersey, Jenny Fromdabloc, and Snot falls hard for her. Meanwhile, Stan wants to live like a gentleman of the 1960s, complete with dark suits and dry martinis.
Stan and Francine fight over how to redecorate the house. It goes so far that they split the house down the middle and try to live without each other.
Francine gets a job at Stan's office, which cramps Stan's style and his ability to flirt with co-workers. When Francine retaliates with a little flirting of her own, war breaks out at work.
Stan spends some quality father-son time with Steve at the local zoo, but things go horribly wrong when Steve slips into a gorilla exhibit. Meanwhile, Roger bets Hayley that he can become a great Country singer and sets out to write the most heartbreaking song of all time.